Give Your Kids the Keys , livre ebook

© 2010 Adam Stadtmiller with Karie Stadtmiller
Published by Revell a division of Baker Publishing Group P.O. Box 6287, Grand Rapids, MI 49516-6287 www.revellbooks.com
Revell edition published 2014
ISBN 978-1-4412-2580-1
Previously published by Regal Books
Ebook edition originally created 2010
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means—for example, electronic, photocopy, recording—without the prior written permission of the publisher. The only exception is brief quotations in printed reviews.
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is on file at the Library of Congress, Washington, DC.
All Scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version® . Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan Publishing House. All rights reserved.
Other versions used are:
GOD’S WORD— Scripture taken from GOD’S WORD. GOD’S WORD is a copyrighted work of God’s Word to the Nations. Quotations are used by permission. Copyright 1995 by God’s Word to the Nations. All rights reserved.
NASB— Scripture taken from the New American Standard Bible , © 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission.
Cover photograph by Aaron Chang.
PRAISE FOR
GIVE YOU KIDS THE KEYS
Adam and Karie have given to parents many wonderful biblical insights, metaphors and tools for raising children who are influencers in this world. This is a practical handbook for deciphering this vital commission for your own family. Our children are the hope of the future. If they are to be properly equipped, we must learn the parental art of “giving them the keys.”
Mark Foreman
Pastor of North Coast Calvary Chapel, Carlsbad, California Author of Wholly Jesus: His Surprising Approach to Wholeness and Why It Matters Today
I would have gladly entrusted my teenaged children to Adam Stadtmiller’s care! Adam knows kids and how to foster their transformation into followers of Jesus. He is devoted to the Scriptures and a Christian worldview. Best of all, in Give Your Kids the Keys , he shows parents how to navigate this scary culture with positive faith and action instead of fear-based retreat.
Todd Hunter
Rector of the Holy Trinity Anglican Church, Costa Mesa, California Bishop of Churches for the Sake of Others Author of Giving Church Another Chance
There is no more important or effective way to participate in the mission of God for the glory of God than to raise our children to love and honor Christ. Adam and Karie offer us great insights into doing just that.
Britt Merrick
Founder of the Reality Network of Churches Author of Big God: What Happens When We Trust Him
In 1979, a 13-year-old named Chris Conrad invited my brother Albie on a youth group trip to Disneyland. This simple act of friendship evangelism changed our lives forever. This book is dedicated to him.
Contents
Foreword by Jim Burns
Foreword by Mark Foreman .
Acknowledgments
Preface
PART ONE
Gas-pedal Parents: Parenting Toward Engagement and Away from Fear
1. Gas-pedal Parents
2. Shepherds in the Wilderness
3. High Mountains and Deep Water
4. Spiritual Arson
PART TWO
Seeing Him: Finding Jesus in the Everywhere of Your Family’s Life
5. While They Were Fishing.
6. The Heavens Declare His Glory
7. Jesus and Half Dome
8. Who Are You Camping With?
PART THREE
Give Your Kids the Keys: Teaching Kids to Live According to the spirit
9. Digging for God .
10. The Voice of God.
11. The Word-based Decision
12. The Conversation of Prayer
Conclusion
About the Authors
Foreword
By Jim Burns, Ph.D.
President of HomeWord Author of 10 Building Blocks for a Solid Family, Faith Conversations for Families and Creating An Intimate Marriage

Jesus was asked, “Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?” ( Matt. 22:36 ). His answer gives us insight into not only how we live our lives but also how we impress our faith on our kids: “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind… . Love your neighbor as yourself” (vv. 37,39).
In Give Your Kids the Keys , Adam will teach you how to bring the main priorities of parenting into the life of your family. In a world with many attractive distractions, this book will remind you of what is most important. Too many people parent by circumstance and chance rather than with true God-honoring purpose. The bottom line isn’t raising obedient or even financially successful kids, but rather raising kids to be responsible adults who love God. This generation of young people and families are being faced with a culture unlike anything we have ever seen before. It will take committed parents who are willing to put first things first in parenting and draw on God’s principles to have a breakthrough in the lives of their family. Adam will guide you to a healthy philosophy of parenting by giving you a foundation to work within your daily life.
My wife, Cathy, and I have tried to make sure we were on the same page with our parenting, but we didn’t always find it easy. In fact, we didn’t find parenting easy. It was rewarding, absolutely, but one of the most challenging aspects of our lives was (and is) trying to raise our children with a deepened faith and a moral compass that points to a biblical worldview. In this book, we found new phrases to help in our journey, and you will too. “Rear-view parenting” and a “gas pedal parent” are just a few of the principles to help you bring about a closer-knit family.
I love how Adam draws on his own experience with practical and inspiring examples that we can all easily relate to within our own families. He knows kids and families. He has worked with them for years, and he is an expert in reaching out to this generation with a hopeful biblical message. He tells us to set the bar high and know that with God’s help, we can become a more solid family that, though far from perfect, strive to love God and love each other.
We have a principle at HomeWord that says, “One of the purposes of the Church is to mentor parents, who will then mentor their children, and the legacy of faith will continue from genera-tion to generation.” Every parent needs mentors. Through Give Your Kids the Keys , Adam and Karie will lead you and mentor you with sound advice.
As you go through this most important calling in your life, don’t forget to stay calm and get as emotionally and spiritually healthy as you possibly can. Then watch your kids learn and develop into faithful followers of Christ. After all, it the ultimate goal to help your kids become those responsible adults mentioned above who have developed a Christ-honoring mission and purpose in life while following the Master?
Foreword
By Mark Foreman
Pastor of North Coast Calvary Chapel, Carlsbad, California Author of Wholly Jesus: His Surprising Approach to Wholeness and Why It Matters Today

It’s easier to get pregnant than to get a driver’s license. Parents have children every day without any consideration of the future. What’s the goal or purpose of parenting? Who are we raising and releasing into the world?
Christian parents usually have a protectionist’s goal of raising children who will go to heaven and, along the way, won’t smoke, drink or have premarital sex. They ride the brakes throughout their child’s upbringing, hoping that when they become an adolescent, or finally a young adult, they won’t crash. Our highest value too often is simply safety.
But, as Adam and Karie explain, the goal of parenting is really the same as the goal of Christian discipleship. Jesus said, “You are the salt of the earth…. You are the light of the world” ( Matt. 5:13-14 ). Salt and light are substances that permeate and invade their environment. So the goal of raising children is that they would penetrate their spheres of influence with the love and truth of Jesus, using the gifts and resources that God has uniquely given to them.
To accomplish this discipleship goal, we must, as Adam and Karie suggest, become “gaspedal parents” who are on the offense, not the defense. We must be parents who model and give opportunity to what we hope to see in them. We can give them opportunities to be “salt” and “light” at each stage of their development.
Adam and Karie have given parents many wonderful biblical insights, metaphors and tools for raising children who are influencers— not evaders—in this world. This is a practical handbook for deciphering this vital commission for your own family. I applaud their desire to help Christian parents turn from retreat and boldly return to true discipleship of their kids. Our children are the hope of the future. If they are to be properly equipped we must learn the parental art of “giving them the keys.”
Acknowledgments

My gratitude to Jesus cannot be expressed in words. Luckily, I will have all of eternity to find a way to say it.
A thank you goes out to Karie and the girls for putting up with me as I worked on this book. Karie, you are a great second set of eyes, and I so respect you. I can’t wait to read your fiction novel. You are my greatest joy this side of heaven.
Thanks also to my mother, Virginia, who had the courage to leave a life of alcoholism and believe that God could restore “the years the locusts have eaten” ( Joel 2:25 ). He surely has!
Thanks also to Boppa Larry and Nanna Pat, for providing us with the love and means to create the childhood memories that will last a lifetime.
To all the youth workers at Skyline Wesleyan who poured so deeply into my life. Your fingerprints were there in my darkest moments.
To all my professors at Point Loma Nazarene and Azusa Pacific. Each of these schools has shaped the core of my theology.
To the parents who added their stories to the content of this book (Mike, Cindy, John, Rache